Read the manual and it says it all: the BMW M5 requires 97-octane. You’d be lucky enough to find a petrol station that sells it, much less afford it; but then again that’s the story of the BMW M5. It’s the story of the very lucky few who can own 10.250-million peso car with two more cylinders and twice the displacement of a modern Formula One car. It’s the story of a souped-up four-door sedan that can blow the doors off almost anything on the road today. It’s the story of how perfectly timed phone call landed us with the M5 for a weekend. If there’s any reason to still believe the Almighty, then it’s this car.
The call came in Wednesday afternoon, while we were typing our lives away in front of the laptop. The BMW rep offered a weekend test drive—nothing extra-ordinary, figuring it could be a new 3 or 5 Series variant. Then it was said: M5. At first, there was a pang of silence, the same way you’d react if you find (insert the name of your favorite girl here) naked on your bed. Then it dawns on you: you’ve just hit the jackpot.
The next day, we arrived to collect the M5. With such an infamous reputation, we half expected the M5 to look like the devil on wheels. It’s quite a surprise to find out how normal it really looks. The typical German restraint meant it looked nothing like the bulging and be-winged tuner cars from Japan. Aside from the side gills and quad-exhaust pipes, you’d swear it was nothing more than a regular 5 Series with the M Sport body kit. Lightweight 19-inch alloys are standard, but again, these can be ticked as an option with just about any BMW sedan. Badges and subtle differences aside, it doesn’t really warrant much more attention. So what in the world do you pay double the price of a 530d for? Well, how’s 507 horsepower for starters?
Shoehorned into the M5’s engine bay is a unique 5.0-liter V10 engine. It’s unique in the sense that a 10-cylinder layout isn’t exactly used that often compared to other engine types. Engine manufacturing efficiency says V8s are practical since they can be used flexibly in more products other than a super sedan, while a V12 can be made by grafting two existing V6 engines together. On the other hand, a V10 is especially made, so given the circumstances; BMW had better gotten it right.
The push-button start sequence serves as an appetizer to the free-flowing burble that comes after. If you’re a fan of sports car racing like Le Mans, the BMW engine sounds something like that. Playing around with such a huge displacement, BMW engineers could have afforded to be lazy and give the M5 a low maximum engine speed. But no, instead, the engine peaks out a nice 8,000 rpm. To prevent over revving, a ‘moving’ redline takes engine temperature into account before eventually maxing it out.
The mere potency of the engine (507 horsepower at 7,750 rpm, 520 Nm at 6,100 rpm) is a recipe for embarrassing high-speed moments for the uninitiated, but in our case, it happened even before we left the parking lot. Where a regular manual or automatic shifter would be, a short stubby aluminum thing protruded: it’s BMW’s SMG shifter. SMG is short for Semi-Manual Gearbox, a system that incorporates a manual gearbox (in this case, a 7-speed unit) with a computer controlled clutch. In theory, it should provide the best of both the manual (responsiveness) and automatic (in-traffic convenience) without the effort or sluggishness. That’s assuming you know how to work it.
Convinced that we’re tech-savvy enough to operate the SMG, we forewent the demo and tried to work it out ourselves. After trying to get the M5 to move for about five minutes, we had to swallow our pride and call the BMW guy back. The correct way to operate the SMG is to think in manual. BMW even made the conscious effort to remind its clients: even without clutch, the pedal orientation is that of a manual—where the brake pedal is small and center-set. To get the car moving in any direction, it’s key to always bring the car to a complete standstill, shift to neutral and slot into plus or minus—just like a manual.
With the embarrassing moment out of the way, it was time to stretch the M5’s legs. Beside the SMG shifter, there’s a ‘Power’ button that re-maps the engine to exact one of three outputs: 470, 500 or 507 horsepower. Don’t ask me why, but by default the engine pumps out just 470 peak horsepower. The 500 is engaged when the button is engaged, while 507 when the ‘Sport’ mode is activated. Give the M5 any stretch of road—any length, and it easily obliterates it at the blink of an eye. We’re not fond of breaking speed limits, but it’s simply addicting in the M5. On the stretch of White Plains Avenue, the norm would be 100 to 120 km/h. The M5 can do north of 200 km/h. Even on the C5 flyover, it can push out 180 despite the moderate traffic. Perhaps what’s even so surprising is how this car can do it effortlessly—it’s as if the speedometer moved as fast as the tachometer.
Such ballistic straight-line speed requires equally surefooted stopping power, and the M5 obliges with its family pizza-sized vented and cross-drilled disc brakes. Despite our constant on-road Looney Tunes behavior, the gigantic brakes halted the M5 each and ever time. There’s absolutely no fade, but the spiffy alloys will look finished in graphite after all the brake dust has settled. Handling is equally assuring with the communicative steering. And if an embarrassing moment does happen, the M5 comes fully loaded with dynamic features—like Dynamic Stability Control, Dynamic Traction Control and Dynamic Brake Control.
Being based off the 5 Series, it should come as no surprise that the M5 manages to balance the new-found sports car finesse with great riding comfort. It’s a given that some suspension compliance has been traded for the quick-wit handling, but the ride’s still on the permissible ride of luxury. The already body-hugging front seats have been furthered upgraded to incorporate more motors than you average Korean car. Everything is movable, expandable and adjustable to give the utmost comfort for any body type. The rear occupants may not share the same luxury, but at least they still have the luxurious seats associated with that of a 5 Series.
Unfortunately, the same luxurious nature of the car clashes with the race-inspired under hood hardware. Let’s note though that the engine isn’t at fault. Despite the high-rev, high-output nature, the V10 can be calm and collected when you need it to be. It’s as smooth as any limo engine out there. That said, the same can’t be said of the SMG gearbox. Even when constantly thinking in manual, it’s still hard to get the SMG to shift smoothly. On higher speeds, say 60 km/h, it’s not too noticeable but anything slower, the M5 shifts like a dog. If you’ve ridden with student drivers, you’ll know exactly how the M5 feels. Most of the time, the gear engagement is sudden causing the car to ‘horse around’. BMW says that the SMG learns to adapt to the user’s driving style, so it probably means this particular M5 may have been to a lot of track days or is perhaps owned by a Mr. Robert Kubica. The manual mode fairs better, but you still have to remember to momentary let off the accelerator for the car to shift. For smoother take-offs, the M5 normally starts on second gear, so always remember to shift manually to first gear when going up ramps, or else the M5 will stall
Equally compromised is the M5’s luggage capacity. Although the 5 Series is known for its cavernous, multiple golf bag swallowing trunk, the M5’s huge full-sized 255/40 R 19 spare tire eats up most of it. If you’re willing to pay an even bigger premium than the already über premium 10.250-million bucks, then you can opt for a mobility kit that swaps the spare tire for a set of run-flat rubber.
Although the M5 isn’t as perfect as BMW would want you to believe, it still personally makes me fire on all cylinders. Owning a super-powered super sedan during this time of fuel crisis may seem like a bit juvenile, but hey, at least it’s exponentially more practical than opting for a two-door sports car. Sure, the M5 only returns 4.10 km/L and requires preventive maintenance every 2,500 kilometers, but it still manages to remain high on my dream machine list. Though I surely cannot afford one in this lifetime or even in the next, at least for a couple of days, I felt like I hit the jackpot, and that’s one experience that simply has no substitute.
By Ulysses Ang | Photos by Ulysses Ang
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